Stop Signs to Recovery- by Peg Tillman (network coordinator)

A subject that we rarely look at are the barriers we erect that prevent us from moving forward with recovery. We want to believe that going to therapy, taking our medication and working with our support systems and groups is enough...but its not enough if we erect stop signs that mentally block us from moving down the road.

Lets look at some of the factors that stop us from moving forward in our recovery.

1. Waiting for the "magic" to happen. Either because we refuse to accept that we have an illness or refuse to accept that recovery requires real work and facing our emotions and fears...we wait for that "magic" to happen that will just take it all away. Whether this is simply a spontaneous recovery, a "magic" pill or some other easy solution....the truth is, it does not exist.

2. We are in our comfort zone. Sounds silly doesn't it...but its true...we are used to the anxiety, panic and depression...its safe...it requires no risks. It may be uncomfortable, but we have figured out it does not kill us and its safer to stay with what we know than to risk dealing with something else.

3. We have become identified with our disorders. We are "panic people" or "depressed people". Its who we are and what we know. To get better would mean we would have to redefine who and what we are...and maybe we would be no one without our disorders...just another person walking down the street.

4. The walls. Some of us are housebound and some of us are selfbound. Holding on to our anxiety and panic, our anger, our resentments, our attitude...is a protective wall against being vulnerable to hurt and pain.

5. Recovery expectations. If we get better, people will expect us to be able to do things we are not sure we can do, even though we are better. What if the panic comes back, what if, even though I am better, I try to do something and it causes a setback. Further more, I will expect more of myself and if I have a setback it will destroy me.

6. The blame game. As long as I can continue to "blame" others, chemical imbalances, my childhood, hormones...whatever...I do not have to push myself to get better because these are things I cannot change. I can remain as I am because its not my "fault".

7. No gain, no pain. I might try to get better and fail. Trying means having to face the panic, anxiety and depression feelings...that hurts too much.

8. Someone else must "fix" me. I am weak, I am sick, I am not able to help myself, so someone else will fix me, tell me what to do, take responsibility for me.

9. Stubborn refusal. I simply refuse to take responsibility for making my life better, I should not have to, its not my fault I am this way, people just need to accept me the way I am.

I hope you can look at yourself and see some of the "stop signs" you have placed on your recovery. If not the ones I have discussed, possibly others.








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